Well-intentioned exclusion, from “The Madwoman in the Rabbi’s Attic”
A thought-provoking book with an intriguing title, The Madwoman in the Rabbi’s Attic by Gila Fine is about the six named women among the thousand or so named men in the Talmud. The author demonstrates that the surface reading of their stories gives the entirely wrong impression. The true meaning of the stories are 180º the opposite.
Here’s an idea that resonated with me: Gila Fine’s thoughts about exclusion.
We are never so well-intentioned as when we exclude the Other. It’s for their own good, we reason, it’s to protect them, and anyway, they wouldn’t want to take part even if they could. Or we tell ourselves it’s to preserve the system, which would never survive if they were to be included. Or we say it is God’s will, that the division is something He preordained. And though there may be some situations that call for separation, there are many more that don’t. For exclusion doesn’t just wrong the Others excluded. It also wrongs us, who are deprived of the good those Others might bring. And, the Akhnai story teaches, it wrongs God, who will swiftly answer their prayers.
Gila Fine likely didn’t know the LDS LGBTQ context, but she sure is singing our song. Everyone is deprived of the goodness in LGBTQ folks when they are excluded.
Another word for “the Other” is “the One” — the one sheep that the shepherd left the 99 to find. If you look around and see 99 who seem to be doing okay, that’s your cue: who is missing? Whose voice would enrich the whole flock if they were here? What do they need? How can we help them, so they can help us be the inclusive Zion we are meant to be?
-Marci